Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Tailgating and Me: Not a Love Story

So, a couple weeks ago, Sarah took me tailgating. While I was initially a bit apprehensive about this (despite the presence of "tail" in the name of the activity), I was assured that there would be food and fun while tailgating. Turns out, even though I got plenty of food while tailgating, I was not a fan.

First, there was not a lot of privacy to do my business. Now, I may be a dog, but I normally have a nice, fenced-in backyard where I can do my thing without other dogs or people watching. But while tailgating, I was not so lucky. I had a little performance anxiety about my peeing, so Sarah eventually had to walk me like a mile so I would go. While I enjoyed the walk, I would rather just be able to go whenever and wherever I please.

Second, there were a LOT of people. While this is usually OK, most of them were drunk. And not the good kind of drunk where they surreptitiously sneak me tasty treats, but the kind where they demand my affection. Seriously, not cool. I give my love only to those who deserve it. Not to Sarah's drunk friends who fail to properly reward my love (with treats, obviously).

Third, of course Sarah dressed me up:

Do I look miserable? Because I was.

Fourth, of course Sarah would not be content dressing me up in one outfit, so I had to wear a second outfit.

No, I don't want to bring you a beer. My owner is just a tool and makes me wear a beer-fetching outfit that she saw on a beer commercial.

Anyway, Sarah did not take me with her this last weekend when she went up there, but rumor has it I may be going back in a month or so. I hope not. However, I will make plans to get out of it, just in case this rumor is true. I see bad behavior in my future...

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