Saturday, May 15, 2010

Cats: My Natural Enemy

Now, as much as I love my grandparents and Wisconsin, all is not rainbows and puppy dogs at their house. Far from it. You see, they have five - yes FIVE - cats.

One of the little cat bastards. This one is named Sonny and is 15 years old. Don't let her age fool you - she has 15 years of experience taunting dogs.

I don't know what possessed my grandparents to get all of these cats. I'm hoping it was temporary insanity.

This one is named Peaches. She was a stray that my grandparents decided to feed, and she just stuck around. So, so wrong. I mean, look at her. Obviously devil spawn.

Sadly, as my grandparents seem to feed any old cat that shows up at their house, I think this is more of a permanent affliction. They should probably seek professional help for this problem.

Would you want to hurt this cute face? Of course not. You're not a cat.

Sadly, I don't have the monetary resources to help my grandparents learn that cats are nowhere near as cute as dogs, and Sarah is too cheap to fund this herself. Plus, obviously, she likes to torture me, so she's perfectly happy to subject me to the cats.

Sonny the cat, on the other hand? Definitely has it out for me.

I'm holding out hope that my grandparents realize how much I hate the cats and decide to get rid of them. After all, I'm so much cuter and more awesome - they really should just do what I want.


  1. Cats are easily bought, Choppy. Maybe if you can lay your paws on some catnip?...

  2. That's an excellent thought!

  3. Actually, Sonny is sixteen. The kittens are fifteen, born in 1995 on Easter.

  4. Oops. Well, it just shows that she's had 16 years to learn to torture me.